IN TROUBLE FOR DREAM CHEATING

You cheated in your partners dream and now you're in the dog house, what would you do?

Going to keep this short. My partner had a dream I cheated and is holding it against me in real life, giving me the silent treatment etc. For reference, there has never been any cheating in our relationship, but we have both been cheated on in the past. How do I nicely say "this is ridiculous" and resolve this?

Ahh dream cheating... tale as old as time. Its always no big deal until you wake up sweating, enraged with feelings of "How could they do this to me!?" and have to talk yourself off the ledge at 7am. Not an ideal way to start the day. Dreams can feel too real sometimes so I understand the initial overwhelm. But to actually continue to hold the grudge for more than a few minutes is a little delusional.

First things first, reassure your partner of reality. I'm here, it was just a dream, I love you, I'd never hurt you that way. As absurd as it sounds, those emotions can feel genuine at first, and even be a little triggering for someone who has been cheated on before. Recalling those sentiments is definitely no fun, so a little patience and grace goes a long way here.

Now, with that all said, if a grudge continues for the rest of the day or into multiple days, you need to look at what kind of person you are really dealing with there. Seeking attention or validation by harboring resentment from a fake cheat smells a little manipulative to me! One more conversation could be had saying look, I know you have fears of cheating because of your past and that is a horrible thing to be reminded of, but I am not that person and you know that, and we need to move on from this dream thing. Sometimes being direct and calm can set a clear boundary and snap someone out of a bad mindset. If the bitterness does not pass after that, it is a true over reaction and you might want to look further into your partners behaviors to make sure your time is not being wasted. Are there other instances of your loyalty, sympathy or response time being tested? Proceed with caution if so! Ask yourself if you really want to be in a relationship where you are not trusted, not only to be faithful, but to be loving and comforting when needed.

So when you approach these conversations, be kind and clear, don't fight drama with drama! You did nothing wrong, and I know it feels stupid to even address, but you get more bees with honey! Hope peace is in your future, friend!