BEST FRIEND BURNOUT

I’ve been friends with this girl for years, but lately she’s been exhausting. Every convo is about her, she never listens to my advice, and I leave our hangouts feeling totally drained. I don’t want to be a bad friend since we go way back, but how do you know when it’s time to walk away from a friendship that’s starting to feel toxic and one sided?

Just because someone’s been in your life forever, doesn’t mean they get to drain the life out of you now. Loyalty is beautiful, but not when it’s one-sided and slowly killing your peace. If every convo leaves you feeling like her emotional support punching bag and she can’t be bothered to ask how you’re doing without making it about herself again? That’s not friendship. That’s work. 

Friendships are supposed to fill your cup, not leave you mentally parched after every hangout. If she never takes your advice, constantly spirals, and you’re walking away more exhausted than energized, you’re not a bad friend—you’re a burnt out one. And the only thing worse than losing a toxic friend is keeping one just to avoid the guilt. You’re allowed to outgrow people who aren’t growing with you. 

So here’s your permission to take a step back. You don’t have to light the friendship on fire, but you can create distance, stop giving all your energy, and see what happens. If she notices and actually shows up differently, great. If not? Even better. You’ve then made space for connections that actually feel reciprocal, fun, and supportive. Because friendship should never feel like a chore.

And here’s the thing no one wants to admit: sometimes the history is the only thing holding a friendship together. But shared memories aren’t enough to excuse constant emotional dumping, dismissiveness, or the fact that she’s never truly shown up for you. You deserve friends who listen, who pour back into you, who ask how you’re doing without spinning it into a monologue about themselves. You’re not her therapist. You’re a whole person with your own needs. If she can’t meet you halfway, or at all, it’s not disloyal to walk away, it’s growth. That’s the most loyal thing you can do for yourself. Good luck navigating the next chapter of this friendship! Xo